I was at the gym today with my wife. She was cycling when an acquaintance of hers - gym buddies to be precise, got into the cycle next to hers and there began their conversation. I was busy working on my floor exercises when my wife came by. I asked her what they were discussing in a nonchalant way. She grinned wryly, she knew I liked gossip as much as any woman she knew.
But it was not gossip that they shared. It was a little more serious. The acquaintance of hers had two kids. Elder one was a girl and the younger a boy - maybe 5 to 7 years old, that's what I deduce the age of the boy to be. This boy on this day had asked his mother what the meaning of the word "Rape" was. The poor mom freaked out and said he is not supposed to say words like that. She was lamenting to my wife saying if the boy had stated this in front of some other people, his teachers for instance how much shame it would beget her! On asking the boy where he had heard the word he says that one of the boys in school says "I will rape you" to girls when he fights with them.
I am sure that the boy who said those words obviously does not know what he means when he says that. He would have known that it meant something bad to women and therefore associated it with some form of punishment specifically against women.
Parenting needs a make over. When I was a kid the worst thing to say was at best - calling someone a dog, pig etc. Parents didn't have to worry too much since all the learning a kid had was from them or from school. Exposure to anything else was minimal. Today's kids are an exposed lot. Media, free internet, mobiles, online games, news channels at home, parents discussions on phone and what not. The amazing and the scary thing about the human mind is this - it can learn infinitely. If you expose it to 2 things it will grasp as easily as grasping 100 things. Therefore today's kids are growing up knowing everything - more than even what their parents know.
So what is a parents role today? That of a guide, a mentor. Kids no more need their parents for knowing right and wrong. They have society's opinions for that. What they need are parents who will talk to them and show them a path. They need parents who will be able to give answers to the more complicated questions like why is rape wrong. It is a known fact that serial killers, and the anti social lot are all people with extremely under developed social skills and the acute inability to sympathize. These are the values that kids need today to be taught to sympathize, to be taught to emote, to communicate. The values of emotional intelligence are grossly neglected in a child's development today. The race is to get them into the best institutions; to develop their IQ's.
Parents are going to have to equip themselves for the times ahead. Parenting is not going to be the same anymore! Its going to be a lot more challenging, and definitely all the more fulfilling and and emotionally rich.
But it was not gossip that they shared. It was a little more serious. The acquaintance of hers had two kids. Elder one was a girl and the younger a boy - maybe 5 to 7 years old, that's what I deduce the age of the boy to be. This boy on this day had asked his mother what the meaning of the word "Rape" was. The poor mom freaked out and said he is not supposed to say words like that. She was lamenting to my wife saying if the boy had stated this in front of some other people, his teachers for instance how much shame it would beget her! On asking the boy where he had heard the word he says that one of the boys in school says "I will rape you" to girls when he fights with them.
I am sure that the boy who said those words obviously does not know what he means when he says that. He would have known that it meant something bad to women and therefore associated it with some form of punishment specifically against women.
Parenting needs a make over. When I was a kid the worst thing to say was at best - calling someone a dog, pig etc. Parents didn't have to worry too much since all the learning a kid had was from them or from school. Exposure to anything else was minimal. Today's kids are an exposed lot. Media, free internet, mobiles, online games, news channels at home, parents discussions on phone and what not. The amazing and the scary thing about the human mind is this - it can learn infinitely. If you expose it to 2 things it will grasp as easily as grasping 100 things. Therefore today's kids are growing up knowing everything - more than even what their parents know.
So what is a parents role today? That of a guide, a mentor. Kids no more need their parents for knowing right and wrong. They have society's opinions for that. What they need are parents who will talk to them and show them a path. They need parents who will be able to give answers to the more complicated questions like why is rape wrong. It is a known fact that serial killers, and the anti social lot are all people with extremely under developed social skills and the acute inability to sympathize. These are the values that kids need today to be taught to sympathize, to be taught to emote, to communicate. The values of emotional intelligence are grossly neglected in a child's development today. The race is to get them into the best institutions; to develop their IQ's.
Parents are going to have to equip themselves for the times ahead. Parenting is not going to be the same anymore! Its going to be a lot more challenging, and definitely all the more fulfilling and and emotionally rich.
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